Many times in my dating adventures, I’ll get a girl’s phone number… we’ll talk for a few days and it will fizzle. There could be many reasons for this and we’ll explore that more in a later blog post, however, this one is simply about the pursuit of happiness.
What is it to be chased? It’s pretty simple, really. We want to feel wanted, desired, and needed. It a basic human need. The chase can be SO much fun that… sometimes… the relationship dies when the chase is over. The idea of wanting can overwhelm the feeling of having.
Chasing isn’t always fun, though. The song “I want you to want me” by Cheap Trick comes to mind here. If you haven’t heard the song before, go listen to it. The lyrics are very simplistic, musically the song is a bit campy, but it’s the message that resonates with people and is the reason for its popularity. Its about someone being in a relationship, in which, they are not fulfilled in that respect. The very real need to feel wanted in any relationship we have.
The fun in chasing comes from the idea that the person being chased is just barely out of reach. That… with a little effort… the person chasing will catch up and win the prize. If that “light at the end of the tunnel” isn’t there… the chase becomes tiring and cumbersome and then eventually… will altogether stop.
The best part of the chase is not even in catching the person. It’s the moments right before where you can see the hard work paying off and you’re finally able to close that gap… or what I like to call the “Anticipation of the catch.”
In simple terms, if you don’t stay within reach… if you don’t show the one chasing you that you WANT them to chase you…. they will stop at some point. That’s the risk of the game. Ask them about themselves, send the good morning text first once in a while. Let someone see they are gaining ground, and the chase can be very thrilling thing and can lead to a very exciting new relationship!